abilitytoreflectcritically

In the feedback I got for my last competency assessment, the teachers told me they could see I wasn't afraid to change my plans and ask for help to do better in my projects, by going to the business station for example.
Despite having learned a lot from previous projects I described in CA2, like not asking for enough money or making clear agreements, I still have run into new difficulties. Difficulties like making paid work for friends and time management.

For the project 'Zon in de nacht'(Sun in the night) I would make an animation together with a friend for the client, who is a musician, but also my friend's dad. I knew from experience that the rules about making work for acquintances can become a little blurry sometimes. We agreed on that we would get a little money for this project and that we wanted to help eachother out.

I always keep in mind what the man at the business station once told me: 'You need to see it as a box that needs to be filled with what you get from the exchange. What do you get back from doing something for somebody? Money? Skills? Fun? If your box gets filled with 25% money, what is the rest of it filled with? If it's not 100% filled, you shouldn't take the job'.

Despite getting very little money, the exchange seemed fair. My friend and I got the opportunity to work together and learn how to make an animation and we would help the client with his music career. The one thing that felt unfair to me was the time pressure put on us. The client prefered that we would finish it before the end of summer. We told him we first had to see how much time making the whole project would take, because we didn't have experience. I said to myself that I will not go out of my way for a project, if I am being underpaid and the box isn't 100% filled.
This is why I didn't prioritize finishing the video fast. It was very timeconsuming and I had to put a lot of work into it. I made the whole design, so everyone was waiting for me to finish it so my friend could start the animation. This resulted in some tension and awkward conversations.

This was again a big learning moment for me. I start seeing the worth of my work more and more. I don't want to go into projects that don't 'fill my box 100%' anymore. I want to be able to say no and set clear boundaries. I do think this is hard, because until now I have a lot of acquaintences asking for commissions. I am afraid that if I raise my prices, they can't afford it and I wouldn't have commissions to make at all. The thing I should do is put myself more out there to make work for 'real clients'.

I had very high ambitions for the work 'Analog Love'. I had gained a lot of confidence during my time in art school. I trusted that I was capable of doing a lot. I wanted to make an animation. I thought I could do the script, storyboard, the props, the set, film and editing all by myself in 3 months. My teachers told me my plan was too big, but I had a vision for the project I wanted to create and had to do it as I had in my mind.

When there was 1 month left, I realized I could indeed not do everything. I decided only doing a part of the project. I picked a scene I thought was most important: the journey of the car. Eventhough I had designed the props of all of the scenes in Illustrator to be lasercut, I only ended up producing the props needed for the car scenes. In between all this, corona happened and I had to continue the project from home.

I painted and glued the props everyday for 2 weeks. Then I started recording and editing all the footage into a small teaser of only a couple of minutes.

Eventhough I very consciously chose to do this huge project, I still overestimated what I could do. If I made the project smaller from the start, for example by only focussing on the car scene, I could have put a lot more details and care into it. I put a lot of time in thinking of scenes and designing characters, that never made it into the video.

If I have an idea for a big project again, I'd want to be more realistic about it, so the project can be more fruitful. I would ask people to work with me or make a much smaller project by myself.